Cyberspace and Men in the Movement

(Time for the standard caveat: Men are victims of violence, too. Men are victims of both sexual and domestic violence at the hands of women and other men. However, I would like to speak specifically about men's role in ending violence against women).

I think it's great to see how many men are now active in the movement to end violence against women. It seems like more and more men are stepping up lately and speaking out, forming organizations, and actively working to stop the violence. Men are impacted by violence against women and men also have a responsibility to take a stand against that violence.

So, here's what I've noticed recently in cyberspace related to men's roles in ending violence against women. So many of the men in the movement have websites titled with their names, depicting their faces, showing their biographies, vitas, success stories, etc. These are considered "big names" in the movement, and their websites can often seem like mini-shrines to showcase the man first and the work second. This is much more rare with women in the movement. In fact, I can't think of any women in the movement off-hand who have their own websites, separate from an organization. For example, take Eve Ensler, the author of The Vagina Monologues. She's one of the most prominent women in the movement right now. When The Vagina Monologues took off, we did not see the creation of www.eveensler.com, we saw the creation of V-Day and its very accessible, movement oriented website www.vday.org. There is very little information about Eve on that site. However, we do have many examples of men with sites just about them.

This is an interesting phenomenon. Personally, I think this could have come about for a variety of reasons, or any combination of the following reasons:

1. It is an extension of male privilege and men exalting themselves for their willingness to do this work, and women exalting them for the same. At the same time that many men have been turned away from this movement, there has also been a tendency to idolize and revere those men who have spoken up, organized, and engaged anyway. They have become saints and saviors to some women. So, naturally, they get this message and run with it toward dangerous, ego inflating territory.
2. Men have traditionally been marginalized from the movement to end sexual and domestic violence. This movement started as a women's movement and has been woman run and woman centered. In certain venues it has been (and still is) run in ways that are anti-male or just not accepting of men. Therefore, men do not have a schema for their role in this work as part of an organized group or agency. Women don't think of themselves as isolated in this work, so they naturally tend toward engaging in the work in an organized capacity and not as single entities.
3. Men have more access to the resources and knowledge required to embark on these cyber endeavors. (This is probably true, even if it isn't the most salient factor).
4. Coincidence...

Really, there could be many other explanations. Those, however, are the main ones that I can postulate at this point. Perhaps they’re all true to some extent.

Regardless, I am glad that men are understanding why they need to engage themselves in the movement to end violence, that men are challenging patriarchal forms of relating to women, the world, and each other. That men are challenging homophobia, racism, classism, capitalism and all of the other forms of oppression that flourish under our patriarchal system. It will take individuals of all genders working together to create real change and to build a world and a system that nourishes all of us, and we must make room for men to do this work.

peace.

Site links:
Please know that I think many of these men are doing excellent work to end violence against women and violence in general. Nothing in this post is meant to suggest otherwise.

Examples:
www.paulkivel.com
www.rusfunk.com
www.jacksonkatz.com
www.alanberkowitz.com
www.michaelkaufman.com

A selection of organizations for men (aka exceptions to the above)
www.acalltomen.com
www.menstoppingviolence.org
www.mensresourcecenter.org

There are many more...

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